The Initiation of Healing Through Dreams

This is the story of how this blog began. The idea came from a dream I had at the beginning of my healing journey. Keep reading to find out what I mean!

A friend of mine met me at a rather cold place in my life. He likes to describe my characteristics then as the quiet, introverted, and quite melancholy. Never malicious, but always brooding during that phase of my life. He lit the match that eventually created a wildfire spiritually. Subtly inviting me in, he had initiated my transformation.

I had been jaded from my upbringing and was unwilling to budge on beliefs. Barely conversing previously, he quickly saw where I stood. Using intellect and science as keys-things that were proven to be true — his approach led me into hundreds of new, open doors within myself. Having written off religion, my attitude toward any faith was slightly callous, but not outwardly. I directed all of my wounds deeply inward instead.

We talked about Carl Jung, a Swiss psychologist, who was a supporter and friend of Sigmund Freud’s, but he challenged his ideas. Somehow, psychology turned into philosophy and ideals and theories. Before I knew it, I was being led down a rabbit hole of endless, other rabbit holes!

My friend told me about his dreaming experiences and my partner at the time surprised me when stating that she grew up always having the ability to fly in her dreams. I was baffled! I did not grow up with this ability and knew nothing about it.

Higher Self

I wasn’t sure what to believe, but I was standing as one person against three other people who had experienced this for a long time. He told me that it’s a specific type of dream called a lucid dream. Then, I wanted to know how I could do it too.

He replied, “ask for your higher self every night before you go to sleep.”

I didn’t quite understand what that meant at the time, but I did it for probably a year or more. Meanwhile, my other friend insisted I start a dream journal. He told me that if I woke up and could remember ANY parts of my dream, I should write it down. He insisted that the more I tried to remember, the more details I would recall each time I put in the effort.

For a long time, I was very frustrated because it really didn’t seem to be working for me. I would get very vivid dreams that seemed important in some way, where I was in control of myself, but nothing outside of me. The environment felt totally out of my hands.

Recurring Dream

I went to see my friends again and this time, I told them about a reoccurring dream I had been having for as long as I could remember, where I always saw myself walking up a set of steep stairs. There was nothing at the top of them except for a white door. It was cracked only slightly, and I could see a bit of light coming through.

Although there was nothing apparently threatening there, I had insidious fears about what I’d find if I went inside, like my own dead body. This thought freaked me out, but every few years or so, this dream would appear again. My friend stared at me intensely as I explained it.

Finally, he says with finality, “go through the door.”

I looked at him like he’d lost his mind, but he just stared right back at me with both confidence and ease. I think I stammered a “but… but…” and he said it again with a half smile on his face this time. Mouth agape, I just sat there.

As if it were obvious, he then says, “well, if you don’t go through the door, you’ll never know what’s inside. Besides, it’s just a dream, right? Nothing can really hurt you in your own head except for you.”

Check. Mate.

I couldn’t argue that.

Surely enough, a couple of weeks later, I had the dream and I went through the door, like I was instructed. As soon as I pushed it open, nothing but pure, white light, like I had never seen before, enveloped me in its loving glow. This experience didn’t last long, however, before it spit me out.

The Labyrinth

The door was an entryway into the labyrinth of my mind, my consciousness, my healing, my awakening, my transformation, my awareness of thyself, etc. I wasn’t afraid of literally dying. I was afraid of the metaphorical death I’d have to experience in order to heal.

I stood up slowly and looked around at what appeared to be some sort of maze. There were hedges, like walls and a specific opening in which I stepped into. I felt as if I somehow kept finding myself in the same exact place over and over again, never getting any further.

Throwing myself down onto the cold stone in a heap at one point, I was incredibly frustrated. Then, it occurred to me that wait a minute… I was in a dream! I realized that that meant that I had become aware of it, which gave me control over it.

With that, I tried conjuring blades to hack the tall hedges down to clear the way. I exhausted myself climbing through brambles. As I got further in, I sneaked past a super-scary, human-sized cobra.

Then, it dawned on me that I could also see this all happening in two places simultaneously, as if I were switching perspectives from in front of me, while watching myself from above. It was like I somehow had two pairs of eyes. I could see then that it wasn’t a maze, but a labyrinth.

Meeting My Higher Self

Still, I felt trapped and lost. I tried to pull myself awake and out of this lucid nightmare, but the deeper part of my mind wouldn’t allow it. I felt an incredibly, angry scream bubbling up from my ego, because I’m the type who hates admitting defeat.

A light turned on in my awareness right as I came to the choice of giving in. I was making the moves in this game, but there was some other presence. How could I also watch myself from another place, having another set of eyes?

I turned around and looked up. Honestly, the most shocking and terrifying thing happened next. I made eye contact with myself, who was much, MUCH larger.

For a second, I stared into the eyes of myself, without a mirror. Another version of me. There was total recognition between both of us and something within me stilled. Just like that, I was at the center of the labyrinth and beginning to awaken from sleep.

I sat up in my bed so quickly, probably looking rabid.

That one, I definitely didn’t need to write down. It was unforgettable.

After a year of asking for my higher self every night before I fell asleep, I realized that the challenges had all been created for me, by me, always.

Thanks for being part of The Lucid Labyrinth <3