A Poem: Master?

I feel so alone again.

The world is desolate,

And I’m the only unlucky enough m*ther f*ck*r left to watch it all fall away.

I’m stuck in a loop as life rewinds the imbalanced insanity of this tape.

Dreadfully replaying my most hateful memories.

I Fall Asleep, Finally.

Dream Of It.

Wake Up.

It’s Still The Same.

Are the days even changing?

My head is spinning physically, literally.

Right ear to right shoulder.

Left ear to- everyone Left.

Left. Left. Left. . . .

They All Just Left.

And I’m the shadow waiting for it’s Master.

Empty as a shell of me.

Paradoxically, too heavy.

Not even an echo of possibility.

I’m holding all the weight that everyone left.

It’s so terribly heavy lately.

I’m a martyr, Master.

I can’t seem to resist this suffering.

Being me is burdening.

Why can’t I be like them, with no gravity?

They fly, while I sink.

I mean, I can’t even swim!

F*ck it.

I’ll pretend another day.

Light it up.

Fake grins.

Replications looking for Transmutations.

Now the dog is staring at me.

I stare back and wait.

Does he feel what I feel?

Can he relate?

He looks awfully confused.

Am I projecting?

He’s my mirror.

Poor bastard, He is and I am.

So, now who is holding the key?

And where’s the Master?

Why has he only left me?

Has he no empathy?

Wasn’t I good enough?

Beautiful enough?

Funny enough?

Smart enough for you, Master?

“Get up!” I tell myself, “move your useless legs!”

It must have been my pride speaking.

My replication playing games with me.

Perhaps, my fight instead of flight.

This shallow, soulless ego just really can’t stand to lose!

Eat your defeat.

I’ll chew on my pride.

It’ll be a feast.

I’ll fight here, alone; as my own master,

until this tired body decides to die.